Broken
by DoubleBinConnecticut
Summary: Ghost or hallucination, seeing him was the last thing she needed. Nathan was dead, and she needed to face reality.  *COMPLETE*
1. The Broken Clock Is a Comfort

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: This idea is based on the end of (Episode 2x06 – Audrey Parker's Day Off) No Complaints if something isn't Cannon. Cannon is too overrated anyway. I accept all reviews: The Good, Bad and (Justified) Flames. The song is Broken by Lifehouse**

_**The broken clock is a comfort**_

_**It helps me sleep tonight  
><strong>_

_**Maybe it can stop tomorrow **_

_**From stealing all my time**_

Audrey stood on the back porch of the Grey Gull, leaning against the building. She felt numb, drained both physically and emotionally. The 'Groundhog Day' cycle that she had experienced was finally over but, not without a price. Two lives had been lost. It left her feeling completely and utterly broken.

She let the tears roll down her face, not bothering to wipe them away. If anyone was to look out the doorway, they wouldn't see her anyway. However, she was aware that he was there standing in the doorway. Giving her space to mourn her loss but, also keeping everyone else from going onto the back deck. However, she was also aware when someone else had joined him.

"Let me through, she needs me!"

"You will never be what she needs, no matter how much you try. Leave her alone, and maybe I'll let you know if she wants to see you."

"I should be with her after what happened."

"What part of 'Leave Audrey the Hell alone' don't you understand? You can stop staring at me, because your affliction obviously isn't working on me."

"This is ridiculous."

"Look, you can leave now or I won't hesitate to literally kick your ass out of here. Make your choice, before I chose option two for you."

The conversation ended, one set of footsteps walking away and the other towards her. A small smile graced Audrey's beautiful face, when she saw him. Duke had become more like the brother she never had, then a friend. He was the only person that she had left in Haven, who loved her and that she could depend on.

Audrey immediately fell into his arms, when she saw him. Duke wished that he could tell her that everything was going to be okay, but now wasn't the time. Maybe, someday the emotional wounds that she was feeling today would heal. But, then again there is just too much that time cannot erase.

She needed to start the healing process. The first step was to have a complete breakdown. Duke had no idea how long they stay like that, him gently swaying her back and forth while she cried. But, he wouldn't let go until she pulled away from him.

"Thank you." She said weakly, when she felt that she could speak again.

"He was the last thing you needed right now," he replied. "What you do need right now is sleep."

"After everything that's happened, I don't think I can sleep."

"Audrey, I say this with love, you look like Hell."

"What a coincidence," she replied, trying to sound sarcastic but failing miserably. "Because that's the way I feel."

"I can't even begin to imagine what you're going through," Duke said, cupping her face in his hands forcing her to look at him wiping her tears away with his thumbs. "Or, everything you experienced on your day off."

"But, before you can even begin the healing process you need sleep." He said, almost sounding as if he was begging her. The desperate, almost lost look in his eyes is what made her give into his request.

"Okay, I'll try for you." She said, pulling away from him.

Duke wrapped one arm around her shoulders, as her led her up the stairs and into her apartment. He helped her take her coat off, and took off her shoes. Then, he covered her up with the blanket at the bottom of the bed. He was about to move away from the bed, to the couch. But, she grabbed his hand stopping him.

"You're all I have left in this Hell hole now," She said, as her eyes started to close. "I'm not going to let some tattooed bastard take you away from me."

"I got your back and you got mine," Duke said a small smile on his face, as he bent down and kissed her on the forehead. "It's us against Haven."

"Us against Haven." Audrey repeated, rolling on her side away from him.

_**I'm falling apart**_

_**I'm barely breathing**_

_**With a broken heart **_

_**That's still beating**_

Duke sat on the couch, waiting until her breath even so he knew that she was asleep. Then, he walked outside onto the deck. The sun had just finished setting, and the moon was bright amongst a sea of stars. Suddenly, anger filled Duke.

"I hope that the powers that be are happy up there," He said angrily, looking up at the night sky. "Is this your idea of a joke?"

"Are you testing her? Or, are you just that sick and twisted that you enjoy seeing her fall apart."

"It's bad enough that she thinks her sole purpose in Haven, is to save the troubled." He continued. "And, you took away the one person that helps her cope with it all."

Suddenly, a huge gust of warm wind pinned Duke up against the building. It took him a minute to realize what was happening, or rather who it was holding him there. "Nathan?" He was a little shocked, but not surprised.

"Shut up Duke, and listen to me."

"Listen to you? You're the one who decided to walk into the light," Duke interrupted him. "She doesn't need me Nathan, she needs you."

"Do you think I wanted to leave her?" Nathan asked, anger and sadness clearly showing in his voice.

"Then, you should have fought harder to stay." Duke replied, and immediately the pressure on his body increased.

"I never fought so hard for anything in my life, but my time was up. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with Audrey."

"What am I suppose to do, Nathan? You were the only one that, could keep her from drowning in depression."

"You need to Man up now, Duke." Nathan replied. "There are people in Haven that, aren't happy that Audrey is here."

"She is going to need your help with the Troubles. You're the only person, that I can depend on the see her through this."

"You need to protect her," He finished. "It's your destiny, so don't screw up."

"So, I don't get to choose my own fate after all." Duke said.

"Not when it comes to Audrey," Nathan replied seriously, pulling back and releasing Duke. "Keep my world safe, Duke."

"And, thank you for keeping Chris away from her."

"No problem." Duke replied. "You don't get all 'Man Crush' around him, when one friend dies and you're worried about how it affects another friend."

"It's funny," Nathan said. "We couldn't admit that we're friends, when I was still alive."

"Just because were admitting that we're friends doesn't mean that, I'm not going to kick your ass the moment I get up there."

Nathan let out a small laugh, and somehow Duke knew he was smiling. "I look forward to you trying to kick my ass, sixty or seventy years from now."

Meanwhile, Audrey's sleep was anything but peaceful. The events of that day ran through her mind, like an endless loop. As if there was some detail she had missed. Anything that would show what she could've done, to prevent the accident from happening. If only she had figured it out sooner. If only she didn't ask Nathan to help solve the case. He wouldn't have been downtown at that time.

But, it was no use thinking about 'If only' now. The Troubled person responsible for her 'Groundhog Day' experience had died as well. Anson Shumway had been hit and killed, by the same hit and run driver as Nathan. Both accidents had happened within minutes of each other. The driver had been an old man, who confused the accelerator with the brakes. Her 'Groundhog Day' had finally ended, there were no more resets.

*FLASHBACK*

"It's all clear, remember to keep your eyes peeled." Audrey said talking to Nathan on her cell phone, while surveying the street as she walked down the sidewalk. "The accident happened right after the church bells at noon."

"Not making many friends," Nathan replied, looking around his surrounding as well. "But, it's pretty quite around here."

"Then maybe it's not going to happen today." She said, with a small sigh and sounding hopeful.

But, before Nathan could reply a beige sedan came tearing down the street and hit him. Audrey felt fear fill her as she ran towards him. She felt a little relived when she saw him stand up, that is until he was fully facing her.

"I'm okay."

"Nathan." Audrey said, fear showing on her face and in her voice now. Nathan followed her eyes and saw what she was looking at. A big piece of the wooden barricade had lodged itself into the lower left side of his abdomen. He started to fall to the ground, but she caught him and slowly laid him on the ground.

"Can someone call 911," she yelled. "We have an officer down!"

"Beige Sedan…Male…Older…Medium build…I didn't get a plate number." He said, struggling for air with each word. Audrey stared down at him. Even though he had been hit, he still managed to get all that information.

"This is kind of strange." He said, glancing down at the chunk of wood that was impaled in him.

"I'm not going to let you die okay, do you understand me?"

The tears that she had been holding back beginning to fall. Even though Audrey knew that she would get a reset, it was pure Hell to watch Nathan die. Especially, when it made her finally realize just how much he meant to her. He was more than just her partner and best friend.

"Stop it! Do you understand? I'm going to fix this."

"Doesn't hurt, the only thing I feel is you." And, it was at that moment that Audrey knew she had lost him. She had unknowingly granted his dying wish though. Nathan had felt her touch one last time.

"No! Audrey screamed, her tears falling harder. No, No, No!"

*END OF FLASHBACK*

_**In the pain**_

_**There is healing  
><strong>_

_**In your name **_

_**I find meaning**_

"Nathan!" They both heard Audrey scream in her sleep.

Suddenly, the huge gust of wind turned into a gentle breeze making its way over to the bed. However, what Duke saw next surprised him. And, he had to blink his eyes a few times to keep his composure and not tear up at the sight before him. Nathan was himself again, as if he never died. Duke quickly left Audrey's apartment. Not only to give the ill fated star crossed lovers time alone, but just in case Nathan saw the look on his face.

Audrey's eyes were still closed, fresh tears falling down her face. However, her sense of touch and smell were very awake. She felt two strong arms wrap around her, and the smell of Pancakes, Lilies and Lilacs, and something uniquely Nathan surrounding her. His touch and smell helped calm her down.

"It's going to be okay, I'm here." Nathan said soothingly, shifting her in his arms so her head was lying on his chest.

"Nathan, I had the most horrible dream…" Audrey said tiredly, eyes still closed but he interrupted her.

"Shhh, go back to sleep." He said, wiping away any of her remaining tears. "You're exhausted."

"Stay with me." She said, snuggling into him. She was holding onto him, as if her life depended on it.

"Always." He replied, struggling to control his emotions.

It took all he had just to say that one word. He wanted to wake her up and give her a mind blowing kiss. But, if he did it would only serve as a cold reminder to them that he was dead. They would never have a chance to share a life together.

So, he settled for tightening his arms around her, kissing her on the head. When he died, his affliction died with him. But, all Nathan cared about was the feeling and touch of the woman he loved in his arms.

_**So I'm holding on**_

_**I'm holding on**_

_**I'm holding on  
><strong>_

_**I'm barely holding on to you**_

**AUTHOR'S NOTE #2: Okay, this was going to be a long one shot, but I'm breaking it up into two maybe three chapters instead. The song lyrics will be explained at the end of the last chapter. **


	2. The Broken Locks were a Warning

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: Okay, so I got a request to make this story at least five chapters long. So, instead of three chapters, there will be five. This is the day after the whole 'Groundhog Day' Experience. **

_**The broken locks were a warning **_

_**You got inside my head  
><strong>_

_**I tried my best to be guarded **_

_**I'm an open book instead**_

Audrey woke up to the annoying sound of an alarm clocking beeping. With her eyes still shut, she reached out with her right hand searching for the clock and shutting it off. She stretched, and then reached out with her right arm. A smile on her face, as she was searching for the man she loved. But, found an empty space instead.

Her eyes immediately opened, the smile leaving her face replaced by panic and a little fear. Until, she noticed that his warmth and smell still lingered there. Letting out a relieved sigh, she rolled over to his side of the bed. Nathan had really been there last night, pulling her out of that hellish nightmare. Holding her all night long, telling her everything was going to be okay.

Audrey wished Nathan had been there when she woke up, but he probably went home to get ready for work. Hell, she wished that he had been the man she woke up to during her 'Groundhog Day' experience. Everything changed when she witnessed Nathan 'dying' in her arms. Audrey could no longer deny what her heart had known for months. She was in love with Nathan, and wanted to be with him. And, the need to tell him this was overwhelming.

Suddenly the sound of snoring filled the room, bringing Audrey back to reality. Duke must have come to the Gull early this morning. Nathan probably asked him to keep checking on her, worried that she would be dragged into that nightmare again. Duke probably decided to get couple more hours of sleep, and that's why he was sleeping on her couch.

The way they worried about her, was one of the many reasons she loved them. Duke like a brother. And, Nathan was everything she had been searching for her entire life. And, it was sad that it took his 'dying' to make her finally realize that. Audrey quietly got out of bed, and grabbed some clothes out of her bureau changing in the bathroom. Ten minutes later she was in her car, pulling out of the parking lot.

Duke had woken up, the moment he heard the apartment door close. He quickly put his boots on, and ran down the stairs while taking his cell phone out of his sweater pocket. He ran to his car, dialing a number at the same time. He knew exactly where Audrey was going.

Duke wasn't going to let her go on believing, that it had all been a dream. Nathan had died yesterday. Audrey wasn't in any emotional state right now, to deal with this on her own. He wanted her to take a few days off, so she could breakdown in private and him trying to help her accept what happened at her own pace.

If Audrey walked into that Police Station, the shocking reality would crash down on her. And, he could only imagine what that would do to her. He didn't want Audrey to withdraw into herself, and believe a dream was reality forever. He had already lost one friend, and he wasn't going to lose another.

"Come on, pick up." He said impatiently, as he peeled out of the parking lot.

"Finally," He said, when a voice on the other line answered. "I need you to go to the Police Station."

"Audrey just left. She had a rough night."

"She thinks that Nathan is still alive." Vince said sadly, stating the obvious.

"Exactly," Duke said. "The last thing she needs is to breakdown in public, when she realizes the truth."

"Dave and I will take care of her, until you arrive."

"Thanks." Duke said. "I'll be there in five minutes." Hanging up, and not caring if he was going above the speed limit. He needed to turn a ten minute car ride into five minutes. And, he didn't know just how long Dave and Vince could stall Audrey. This was an emergency as far as he was concerned.

When Audrey arrived at the police station, she noticed that Nathan's truck wasn't there. The feeling that something was wrong ran through her. Nathan was always on time. He would tease her whenever she was late, reminding her that the Haven P.D. starts work at 9am. Audrey parked in her normal parking spot, but didn't get out of the car. Instead, she leaned back in the seat. Her eyes closed. That damn nightmare was making her paranoid. Nathan was probably running late this morning, or maybe his truck broke down and he had to get a ride to the station.

Audrey shook her head, to get rid of any remaining thoughts of her nightmare. She sat there for a few more minutes, flipping the blinder down to look at her reflection in the small mirror. She would be able to fool everyone else, but Nathan would know that something was wrong. They could read each other like books.

A knock against the car window, made Audrey jump a little bringing her back to reality. She turned her head and saw Vince and Dave Teagues standing there. Audrey smiled, as she got out of her car and locked it.

"What's the story Moring Glory?" Dave greeted her. The saying was corny, but a little sweet at the same time.

"Nothing much, just going to work as usual." Audrey replied.

There was an awkward moment of silence. And, Audrey could tell something was wrong. But, then again the Teagues Brothers were just full of secrets. So, she really didn't give too much thought to their behavior at first.

"Are you feeling alright?" Vince asked concerned. As He and Dave moved to stand in front of her. "Maybe you should take the day off."

"A day off is the last thing I need." Audrey said, pushing past them. Only to have Dave and Vince stop her again.

"Vince is right," Dave added. "You look really tired."

"Great. If I can't fool the two of you," She said. "Then, Nathan definitely will know something is wrong."

"And, He won't leave me alone until I tell him." She finished.

Another moment of awkward silence passed between them. Audrey couldn't ignore Vince's and Dave's behavior. They were trying to act like everything was normal, and like nothing was wrong. This was about more than a secret, and she was determined to get an answer. Vince and Dave could no longer take the intense stare that Audrey was giving them. They knew that she knew something was wrong. Their plan had been to keep Audrey out of the police station, until Duke arrived. Well, not an actual plan just improvising to stall her.

"Is everything okay, Guys?" She asked suspiciously. "You're acting odder than usual." Dave and Vince looked at each other for a moment. As if they were having some kind of psychic conversation, like some siblings shared. Audrey was about to repeat her question, when Dave finally spoke.

"She's onto us, Vince. We must be out of practice."

"You mean that you're out of practice," Vince replied. "She didn't suspect me." Audrey couldn't help but smile, at the little display of sibling rivalry. She still wanted to know what was going on with them, but she had other priorities that came first. So, the unusually odd behavior of the Teagues Brothers would have to wait. She tried to walk pass them again, only to be stopped once more.

"Guys, I really can't be late." Audrey said a little annoyed, but trying to be nice about it. "Believe it or not, but Nathan tends to get annoyed if I'm late."

"Well, he will be annoyed if you go in there." Dave said. "Nathan would want you to take a few days off, especially after everything that has happened."

Audrey just stood there and stared at them, trying to remain calm. How did they find out about her 'Groundhog Day' experience?" Nathan and Duke were the only ones who knew the whole story. And, they wouldn't betray her trust by telling everyone what happened. So, how did Dave and Vince find out?

Being the great detective that she was, Audrey knew they were stalling her for some reason. Why were they trying to keep her out of the station? Audrey replayed the whole conversation with them, in her mind. The awkward silence and, how the brothers seemed uncomfortable whenever Nathan's name was mention. How they could no longer look her in the eye, and the mixture of sadness and pity that was in their eyes when they did. A look of what they were feeling for her. Not to mention the panic she felt when she didn't see Nathan's truck. After adding up all the 'evidence' the answer hit her like a ton of bricks. Last night was only a dream.

Audrey hated that she let a dream mess with her mind. But, Nathan felt and smelt so real. It was also no coincidence that the Teagues Brothers were there. Duke must have heard her leave this morning, and called Vince and Dave to stall her until he arrived. Their hearts were in the right place wanting, to help her anyway they could with dealing with her loss. Trying to save her from breaking down, in front of the whole Haven P.D. when she remembered why Nathan wasn't there.

However, Audrey knew that she needed to walk into that building. Sooner or later, it would have to happen. And, she was already there. So, sooner it was. She needed to remain strong. She was the lone defender, and protector of the Troubled now.

Audrey knew that this was the opening the Rev was waiting for. It was the chance for his self-righteous poison to infect all of Haven. Using Nathan's death as the prime example that coddling the 'cursed' would only result in death. The battle lines had been drawn, and the war deciding Haven's fate had begun.

And, Audrey refused to go down without a fight. So, she would sit in Nathan's old office. Grieve the loss of her partner, and best friend. The man she loves. If this was part of the healing process, then she would do it. No matter how hard and painful, it would be.

Audrey pushed her way past Dave and Vince, and ran into the Police Station. She ignored them when they called her name, as they quickly followed behind her. She didn't notice that Duke had arrived either. However, she did notice the reactions of everyone in the station.

Some people would look at her with half-hearted smiles and pitying looks. Some people were looking and whispering to each other. And, some people wouldn't even look at her at all. But, no one dare approached her. Audrey couldn't really blame them. After all, she had no idea what she would do if someone else was in her position.

However, Dave and Vincent gave everybody disgusted and disapproving looks. But, Duke openly expressed his opinion. Maybe he should keep his mouth shut, but he just didn't give a damn. This was about protecting Audrey.

"It's time all your asses start doing your jobs." He stood in the middle of the police station, glaring at each and every person within his view. "And, leave the only other person who actually saves Haven alone." He walked away, leaving a stunned room full of people behind.

Dave and Vince were standing outside of Nathan's old office, guarding the door so no one could bother Audrey when Duke arrived.

"Thanks, for the help guys." Duke said, with a small smile.

"No thanks needed." Dave said. "We'll help Audrey any way we can."

"We'll just guard the door," Vince said. "Until, Audrey's ready to leave."

Audrey was sitting in the desk chair. Her legs pulled into her chest, arms wrapped around her knees and face buried in her knees. She was so lost in her own grief, that she didn't hear the door open and close. She looked up when she felt someone touch her arm. Audrey stood up, immediately falling into Duke's arms. He held her, gently rocking her back and forth like he had last night.

He silently cursed Nathan, for staying with Audrey last night. He also blamed himself, for letting it happen. Not that he had any say in the matter. It only caused Audrey more pain in the end. Duke moved them to the couch, both of them sitting sideways as she cried in his arms. After what seemed like an eternity, Audrey finally spoke.

"Vince and Dave must think I'm a delusional and crazy mess." She said, lifting up her head to look at him.

"It's okay," Duke said, trying his best to comfort her. "All we care about is you."

"If you were acting normal and like nothing happened, then we would worry about you."

"Audrey," He continued. "Yesterday, you were trapped in a Living Hell."

"And, lost someone you loved when it was all over. So, it's understandable"

"If anyone has a problem with it," He finished. "Then, they will have to deal with me."

"Just look at his office." Audrey said angrily, motioning with her right hand at the now bare room. The only things left were the Desk, Chair and Black leather couch against the wall across from the desk.

"Nathan isn't even buried yet," She said. "And, already this town is trying to erase him."

"I promise you, that we won't let that happen." Duke interrupted her. "It's us against Haven, remember?"

"Yes, I remember." Audrey replied, hugging him again. "Thank you for being here for me, Duke."

"Maybe, believing that my dream was real is a good thing." She said. "It led me here."

"Who knows," She continued, tears falling down her face again. "Maybe it was Nathan's way of helping me begin the healing process."

"The first step after breaking down is acceptance, right?" She finished. "But, I know that I'm still far away from being my normal self again."

Duke pulled away from Audrey, just enough to cup her face in his hands so she couldn't look away. He was glad she wasn't in denial, and hoped that time would help her heal her emotional wounds. That when she thought of Nathan months or years from now, the pain and sadness wouldn't feel as raw as it did right now. That was someday this was now.

He knew that he wouldn't be able to replace the strong friendship that Audrey and Nathan had, no one would. What Nathan and Audrey had was a bond that lasted more than a lifetime. And, Duke would never try to replace Nathan. He would go on proving to Audrey, that he was a friend she could trust and depend on to always be there for her. And, he wasn't going to lie to her.

"Audrey," Duke said, wiping away her tears. "It wasn't a dream."

_**I still see your reflection **_

_**Inside of my eyes  
><strong>_

_**That are looking for a purpose **_

_**There still looking for life**_

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: Okay, this seems like a good place to stop. Hopefully, I'll have the next chapter up soon. **


	3. In the Pain Is there Healing

_**I'm falling apart **_

_**I'm barely breathing**_

_**With a broken heart **_

_**That's still beating  
><strong>_

"What do you mean, it wasn't a dream?" Audrey asked, staring at him. Confusion, curiosity and a little hope showing on her face.

"Nathan paid us both a visit last night, or more like his spirit did." Duke explained

"He told me about the people in Haven, that don't want you here." "And, told me that my fate is to help you."

"Nathan wants me to take his place, in helping you with the Troubled." He continued.

"I'm not exactly an expert when it comes to the Troubled. But, I'll help you anyway I can."

"And, we won't let this town erase Nathan." He finished. "I promise you that."

"So, he really was there last night?" Audrey asked, needing to confirm what Duke just told her. "And, I'm not going crazy?"

"Yes, he was there." Duke assured her. "And, you're automatically considered crazy if you want to live in Haven."

"At least he looked like himself, and was gentle with you. With me, he first appeared as a huge gust of wind."

"Slamming me against the building, forced me to follow his every demand." He continued, with his Drama Queen routine making Audrey laugh.

"It's not funny, you're boyfriend basically manhandled me."

"I can't complain to anyone in Heaven about it either." He finished. "Blaming the powers that be up there for taking Nathan away from you, doesn't exactly help me earn my halo."

"You actually blamed everyone in Heaven?" Audrey asked surprised.

"Yea, and that's not all. I also told most of the Haven P.D. to get off their asses, and do their jobs." He said, giving her a smile. "No one is going to bother you, as long as I'm around."

"I would've loved to have seen their faces." Audrey said. "But, you do realize that I will have to protect you now."

"Everyone will probably be looking for some reason, to haul your ass into jail now."

"Hey, I'm just reacting like any good brother would." Duke replied. "There's nothing wrong with that."

"It's kind of weird, but nice." She said.

"What is?"

"How our friendship turned into a Brother/Sister relationship."

"Well, you needed someone to complain to about Nathan." Duke explained. "And, unfortunately because you have no girlfriends I got stuck listening to you."

"You're immune to the Crocker charm, and unbelievably good looks." He continued. "Which I may add is extremely rare."

"I mean, really who can resist this?" He finished, gesturing with both his hands at his body.

"Maybe, I prefer strong, silent and brooding." She said. "Not the openly flirtatious and egotistical."

"Not even the whole 'Bad Boy' angle appealed to you? I thought all women loved Bad Boys."

"Not, all women have a man like Nathan Wuornos in their lives. I was very lucky." She replied, with a small sad smile on her face. "Now, I have to plan a funeral."

"Nathan always thought he was the lucky one." Duke said. "And, it's not you. It's we have to plan a funeral."

"Can't exactly keep it away from the public though," "Since people witnessed him dying on Main Street."

"That's why I'm going to ask Dave and Vince to help with the arrangements." Audrey said. "They were a big help with The Chief's burial and Memorial Service."

"And, since they're here we should discuss the arrangements now." Standing up and walking to the door.

_**In the pain **_

_**(In the pain) **_

_**Is there healing**_

_**In your name **_

_**(In your name) **_

_**I find meaning**_

Dave and Vince immediately turned around, when they heard the door open. Audrey smiled at them then stepped out of the way, allowing them to walk in and shut the door behind them. They each gave her a hug, and a smile of genuine concern not one trace of pity in it. Duke was no longer sitting on the couch, but leaning against the desk. Letting the Teagues Brothers have the couch, and Audrey sat back down in the chair.

"If you guys don't think I'm a delusional and crazy mess," She said. "I have a favor to ask you."

"We don't think that at all." Vince said

"We would be worried, if you were acting calm and like your normal self." Dave added. "Anything you need just ask."

"Can you help with the arrangements? Duke and I have never done this before."

"Since all the town knows by now how Nathan died," Duke added. "We can't exactly keep this on the down low."

"But, you can keep the burial place a secret." Vince said. "Assuming that you want to bury Nathan next to Garland, right?"

"Then, the easiest way would be cremation." Dave explained. "Everyone would expect you to keep his ashes, and an urn would be easier to bury then a casket."

"Wait. Why do I have this eerie feeling that you've done this before? And, I'm not just referring to Chief Wuornos either." The response Duke got was Audrey standing up leaning across the desk, and flicking him behind his left ear.

"What was that for?" He asked, looking at Audrey while rubbing his ear. Dave and Vince watched them rather amused.

"For asking a question, we all know you won't get an answer to." Audrey replied then, looked at the Teagues Brothers. "And Yes, I want Nathan buried next to his father."

"Did you also want to have a wake, or just a funeral?" Vince asked, trying to be delicate about the whole situation.

"Neither. Nathan would want something simple. I think the best option would be cremation, and a Memorial Service at the Gull."

"And, I can't believe those words just came out of my mouth." She finished a mixture of disbelief, and sadness showing on her face and in her voice. "Then again, I never thought I would have to discuss burial plans for Nathan."

"Audrey and I will take care of the Memorial Service." Duke said, gently squeezing her right hand.

"We should meet tomorrow, so you can…." Vince said, but Audrey interrupted him.

"No, I trust your judgment. And, I want the Memorial Service to be Saturday and 2pm."

"It will take a day or two for our part, depending of the funeral home's schedule." Vince said.

"But, don't worry. Our part of the arrangements will be ready for Saturday." Dave said. "We promise."

"Duke, I'm ready to get out of here." Audrey said, not wanting to talk about it anymore. Afraid she would breakdown again.

"Sure, but let's take the back way out."

"I appreciate and love the fact that my 'Little Brother' wants to protect me." She said, giving him a hug.

"I walked through the front door, and I'm going to walk out it."

"Besides, I forgot my purse in my car." She finished. "And, my keycard is in it."

"Okay, but you have it all wrong." Duke said one arm wrapped around her shoulders, as they walked out of the office. "I'm your 'Big Brother." And, Audrey flicked his left ear again in response.

"Stop flicking me behind the ear." Duke said, rubbing his left ear again. "I can't believe Nathan left me with an ear flicker."

"Have to keep you in line somehow, and now protect you from half or all of the Haven P.D." She said, with a smile on her face. "That's why I'm the 'Big Sister' in this relationship."

Dave and Vince couldn't help but chuckle at them. For just a few moments, Duke had made Audrey forget about all her sadness, regret and anger. He got her to laugh and smile. Someday she would be able to do those things on her own. And, they both agreed that Nathan had left Audrey in good hands.

When they got back to the Grey Gull, Audrey just stood by the front door staring. Duke noticed the expression on her face, a mixture of sadness and a little anger. He knew it wasn't the fact that Chris was walking towards her. No, he knew exactly what was bothering Audrey.

There was another Man and Woman sitting in 'their' seats. The barstools marked with A.P.P. and N.T.W. in permanent black marker. They were talking, drinking and laughing. Just like Audrey and Nathan had, spending hours on those barstools. And, Duke knew it was hurting her.

Even as Chris approached them, Audrey kept her eyes on the couple. Duke had to resist the urge to literally kick Chris's ass out the door. Chris Brody was the last thing Audrey needed. But, Audrey needed a distraction right now. And, unfortunately Brody being there was a good thing.

"I wanted to see you, but I'll understand if you want to be left alone." Chris said, giving her a smile.

"Audrey," Duke said, gently squeezing her hand. "Why don't you two go talk on the back deck."

"And, if you need me just yell." Audrey smiled, giving him a kiss on the cheek and walked towards the back porch. Chris started to follow her, but felt a strong hand tightening on his shoulder. He turned around and looked at Duke.

"If you do anything to upset or hurt her," The tone of his voice low and deadly, matching the glare on his face perfectly. "You won't be walking out of here, understand?"

"I have no intentions of doing either." Chris replied, shaking Duke's hand off his shoulder. "It's just too bad that you and, especially Nathan can't see that."

"It must really piss you off, that I'm immune to your affliction." Duke said, smirking at him. "I'm just giving you a friendly warning." Chris said nothing, and just walked away.

Duke couldn't help but feel a little bad for the guy. He knew that Audrey was going to break up with Chris. He could've just kicked him to the curb on Audrey's behalf. But, it was something Audrey needed to do. Not to mention that she would be a whole lot nicer about it.

However, he would still eavesdrop on their conversation. Just in case Audrey needed him. And, he knew Nathan would be listening, too.

Audrey was staring out at the water. She wasn't in the mood to deal with Chris. But, she couldn't lead him on anymore. The whole 'Groundhog Day' experience had opened her eyes. A horrible wakeup call, that finally made her see everything clearly. She heard him walk onto the deck, after taking a deep breath she turned around.

He tried to give her a hug, but she moved out of his reach. She saw the hurt in his eyes, but didn't really care.

"Sorry about the guy downtown…And, Nathan." Chris said hesitantly, arms at his side keeping the space between them.

"It's okay to talk about Nathan and say his name." She replied, looking out at the water again. "He's not one of Haven's secrets."

"Audrey, we don't have to talk about him." He said softly, closing the gap between them. Placing a hand on her cheek and, forcing her to look at him.

Audrey moved an arm's length away from him again. There was an awkward moment of silence between them, and then she continued. "Sorry, I didn't mean to take it out on you. I guess the way everyone avoided me at the Police Station this morning, bothered me more than I thought."

"You went to the Police Station? Audrey, it's too early for you to do that." He said, surprised that she did that.

"Don't you think that is for me to decide?" She said, glaring at him.

"Sorry, that came out wrong." He said, giving her a small smile. "What I'm trying to say is you went through Hell yesterday, and need time to grieve."

"Tell me something I don't already know, or haven't been told." She said sarcastically. "I don't want to talk about it."

"Don't do this Audrey, to you or me." He said, grabbing her hands holding them in both of his. "Don't shut me out…please."

"Audrey, I understand that you want to help the troubled." "But, you can't save everyone."

"I know how much Nathan meant to you." He continued. "No one can fill the void in your heart that, he left behind. Not even me."

"But, he wouldn't want you to go on grieving alone."

"I need you, Audrey." He finished, cupping her face in his hands. "And, you need me."

"That's why this relationship wasn't going to last."

"What are you saying?"

"In one breath you tell me you want me for me. And, in the next you tell me that you need me." She said, pulling away from him. "Wanting and needing are two separate things."

"You need me because I'm immune to your affliction." She finished. "I make you feel normal. But, we both know that eventually you will hate me for it."

"I don't believe this. He said, pissed off. "Which is it Audrey?"

"Spending the rest of your life in love with memories of a dead man," He finished. "Or, with a man who is still alive and loves you."

"You're right," Audrey said. "No one will ever be able to replace Nathan."

"He never needed me to cure his affliction, unlike you. I was the only thing he could feel, and he never made me feel pressured or obligated to touch him. His actions spoke louder than any pretty words, or looks you could ever give me. He was the only person I completely trusted in this Hell hole of a town, the only person that keep me grounded." She continued, without taking a breath.

"So, the answer to your question is yes." She finished, glaring at him. "I'd rather be in love with a dead man, who is very much alive in my heart. Instead, of someone who is so self centered they use their affliction to manipulate people into getting everything they want."

There was an uncomfortable silence between them again. Audrey didn't realized that by her trying to distance herself from Chris's touch, that he had backed her into a corner of the deck. Until, she felt the railing pushing into her back.

"Goodbye, Chris." She pushed past him, and walked towards the back door entrance. Even though Duke knew Audrey could handle herself, having seen her take down guys twice her size. It still didn't stop him from listening to the conversation. He was ready to kick Chris's ass out of there, all she had to do was say the word. Knowing that Duke was there also gave her a sense of safety and security, one thing both him and Nathan had in common.

"Audrey, I'm not done talking with you." Chris yelled, quickly closing the gap between them. He was about to grab her arm, when a huge gust of wind slammed him up against the wall. Audrey watched Chris turned as white as a sheet, when they both heard Nathan's voice.

"Touch her again, and I will kill you." His voice sounded low, cold and deadly. "I'm already dead, and have no problem going to Hell."

"Nathan, let him go." Audrey said softly.

Chris looked at Audrey as if she was crazy. The sudden powerful odd breeze couldn't be Nathan. However, he changed his mind when it pushed him through the opened back door. Luckily, the man and woman were no longer there. Neither were the two barstools. Duke just stood there, as he watched Chris put his arms out to keep from crashing into the bar.

"Why doesn't anyone, take my friendly warnings seriously?" Duke asked, pretending to be concerned.

"I would've helped you," Trying not to laugh as, Chris looked at him dazed and confused. "But, my hands are full as you can see." Lifting his arms a little bit, indicating to the two barstools he had in each arm.

Duke left Chris at the bar and continued walking out onto the back deck. Audrey was looking out at the water again. Duke put the two chairs down, stretching his arms as he walked the few steps to stand beside her.

"I'm glad that I wasn't on the receiving end of that." Duke said. "Brody won't be bothering you again."

"You should've seen the look on Chris's face, when he heard Nathan's voice coming from the wind." She said, small smile on her face and eyes still focused on the water.

"He must've been scared shitless. I did warn him that if he upset you, he would wish that he dealt with me instead."

"Where's Chris now?"

"Sitting at the bar, trying to figure out what the hell just happened." Duke replied. "Don't worry about him."

"Why do you think Nathan appeared as wind this time?" Audrey asked.

"I don't know." Duke replied, wrapping one arm around her shoulders. "Maybe, he doesn't want to hurt you anymore then you already are."

"That sensing he is here would be less painful, then actually seeing him."

"I hope you're right." She said, leaning against him. "I don't think I would be able to cope with losing him, if I saw his spirit all the time.

_**So I'm holding on **_

_**(I'm still holding) **_

_**I'm holding on **_

_**(I'm still holding) **_

_**I'm holding on **__**(I'm still holding)  
><strong>_

_**I'm barely holding on to you**_

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: Hey, not all of this story can be depressing. I think Duke would try to get Audrey to smile or laugh, even if it's only for a few minutes. **


	4. I'm Hanging On to the Words You Say

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: Finally, after making anyone who has (read, reviewed, put on their favorite or alert list) waited for months for another chapter. My muse, he has finally come back to me. And, here is the next to the last chapter. I promise not to make you wait so long for the last chapter.**

_**Hanging on another day**_

_**Just to see what you throw my way  
><strong>_

_**And I'm hanging on to the words you say  
><strong>_

_**You said that I will be Okay**_

The rest of the week seemed to pass by slowly, as if time was dragging out the inevitable. It had only taken her and Duke one day to plan the whole Memorial Service. Part of Audrey wanted to go to work. But, the Teagues Brothers, and especially Duke would fight her on that decision. A fight Audrey knew she wouldn't win. So, she literally begged Duke to let her help with any work he needed done at The Gull. Truth was that she didn't want to sit in her apartment for the rest of the week. She needed to feel useful.

Now, here she was 12pm on Friday afternoon. Alone in her apartment, sitting on the bar stool marked A.P.P. and staring at the one next to it marked N.T.W. Duke had given her the two barstools, the day she broke up with Chris. During the past few days when she was alone, she would just sit there. Thinking about Nathan, and regretting pushing him away all those months. Because, she was worried it would ruin their friendship, if a romantic relationship didn't work out for them. Nathan was the one person in her life that, she couldn't afford to lose. But, she lost him anyway. And, they would never know what might have been.

A knock on the door, brought Audrey back to reality. She really wasn't in the mood for company right now, and glad she had installed a peep hole in the door. Audrey opened the door, stepping aside to let Duke in. However, her eyes never left the object he was holding in his hands.

"Dave and Vince thought it would be best, for me to give you this." He said gently, but knowing that there were no words that could soften the blow. And, she knew that this was just as hard for Duke as well.

_**The broken lights on the freeway**_

_**Left me here alone  
><strong>_

_**I may have lost my way now **_

_**Haven't forgotten my way home  
><strong>_

Audrey stood with her back against the door, staring at the urn in his hands. Duke didn't pressure her into taking it. He would wait until she was ready. After a few minutes, without a word she held out her hands. Duke carefully placed the urn in her hands, which were a little shaky but she didn't drop it. He noticed how she held it in her arms, examining every detail about it. And, Duke wished that it was a little version of Audrey or Nathan sleeping in her arms instead.

"Dave and Vince made an excellent choice." Audrey said looking down at the square, black marble urn in her hand. Nathan Thaddeus Wuornos and the dates of his birth and death, elegantly engraved on top of the urn.

"They wouldn't let you or Nathan down."

"I can't believe that this is happening." Audrey said, still staring down at the urn.

"Yea, I'm going to miss Nathan too." Duke said, and Audrey looked at him a small smile on her face.

"What?"

"Never thought I'd see the day when, Duke Cocker openly admits that he misses Nathan Wuornos."

"Well, it was so much fun annoying the Hell out of Nathan." He smiled back at her. "I'm going to miss that."

"Seriously, it's not easy for me either." His smile instantly faded. "I didn't think that someone that I grew up with, was friends with would die this young."

"I definitely didn't expect that person to be Nathan." For the first time since Nathan's death, Duke was finally showing how much in affected him.

He had been strong for her through this whole horrible experience, and now it was her turn to return that favor. Audrey quickly walked over to the kitchen table, placing the urn on top of it. Then, walked back over to Duke and pulled him into her arms. She didn't need to say anything, just hug him and let him grieve for the loss of his friend. Of course, Duke wouldn't have a breakdown like her. But, Audrey knew he would shed a few tears.

After a few minutes, Duke pulled out of the hug and walked into the bathroom. The last thing he needed was, The Grey Gull staff seeing their boss with a tear streaked face. And, he knew Audrey would never tell anyone he cried. He waited for a few minutes, wanting to make sure he had fully gained his composure. When he finally walked out of the bathroom, Audrey smiled at him and he smiled back.

"I need to get back downstairs. And, you need to get out of this apartment for a while."

"I really don't want to be around people right now." She said.

"Then, go to the one place no one will bother you."

"You mean the sight of the Colorado Kid murder." Audrey said. "Only I would pick a murder scene, as my thinking place."

"Then, again I was Lucy Ripley twenty-seven years ago. So, it kind of makes sense." Duke immediately took both of her hands in his.

"Look at me Audrey." He demanded. Sounding and looking very serious.

"You are Audrey Parker, not Lucy Ripley."

"Yes, you look like her. Dave and Vince have told you that, you were Lucy." He continued. "But, none of that proves shit."

"Until, someone finds a DNA sample or any other physical evidence to confirm it." He finished. "You are Audrey Parker."

"Wow, for a minute you sounded just like Nathan." Audrey said.

"Then, I must be doing my job right." Audrey kissed Duke on his cheek, before grabbing her cell off the stand next to her bed. She looked at the urn sitting safely on the kitchen table then, walked out the door. Duke looked at the urn as well, before shutting the door behind them.

_**I'm falling apart **_

_**I'm barely breathing  
><strong>_

_**With a broken heart **_

_**That's still beating**_

_**In the pain **_

_**(In the pain) **_

_**There is healing  
><strong>_

_**In your name**_

_**(In your name) **_

_**I find meaning  
><strong>_

Ten minutes later, Audrey was at her usual thinking spot. Sitting in the same spot that The Colorado Kid's body was found. Anyone else would probably think that, a twenty-seven year old unsolved crime scene was an odd thinking place. But, Nathan never did. Even when he found out that her reason for going there now, was that she thought she was Lucy Ripley. And, was trying to gain back any of Lucy's memories. He would just take her hands in his, and reminder her that she was Audrey Parker.

But, this place is more than a murder scene to her now. It was the place where Nathan told her, that he could feel her. If only she hadn't denied what was right in front of her. Nathan was the first relationship that worked out, and lasted more than a few months. He was too much of a damn Gentleman, to push her into something she didn't want. Something she finally realized she wanted, and would always wonder about.

If only she hadn't been scared of, ruining their friendship. She should've known before now that, if a romantic relationship didn't work out between them. Nathan would never abandon her. But, her fears and doubts got in their way. Now, it was too late.

"We both know why Duke suggested, that I come here. She began, looking up at the clear blue sky. "And, we both know that you wouldn't want me to hold anything back."

"I'm pissed at you Nathan."

"Just because you don't have the sense of touch or feel pain, doesn't mean you're invincible. I don't need you to protect me all the time."

"You should've never agreed to help me solve that case. Then, you would be here with me now." She continued. "You should be with me right now."

"But, I'm pissed at myself more. I'm supposes to save the troubled." As the tears she had been holding back, fell down her face.

"And, now Duke is involved. What happens if I get him killed?" She said. "Or, if I fade with the Troubles leaving him all alone."

"You are the only person that made Haven feel like home. How am I supposes to do this without you, Tough Guy?"

"If I just had one more chance…" Suddenly, she felt a pair of familiar hands cup her face wiping her tears away. Audrey was shocked, but didn't pull away. Until, reality hit her like a ton of bricks.

_**So I'm holding on **_

_**(I'm still holding) **_

_**I'm holding on **_

_**(I'm still holding) **_

_**I'm holding on **_

_**(I'm still holding)**_

_**I'm holding on **_

_**(I'm still holding)  
><strong>_

_**I'm barely holding on to you**_

"Audrey, open your eyes." Nathan said gently.

"No." She said, quickly removing his hands from her face. Nathan's hands felt real, but she knew the feeling was just a hallucination brought on by grief and memories. "It's hard enough that I have to bury you tomorrow, knowing that I failed you."

"Stop with the smells of Lilies and Lilacs, pancakes and the warm gentle breezes. I don't want to see you or sense your presence ever again."

"Just leave me alone."

"You can never fail me." Nathan said seriously.

"Yes, I have failed you."

"I told you that you're the one person I could absolutely trust. But, I left you alone in that root covered barn. After, you risked your life to rescue me."

"What if Beverly Keegan's and Dom Novelli's love hadn't been enough, to part the roots?" She continued. "What if it was the love that Peter Novelli and Maura Keegan shared, and whatever love Duke and Evi still had for each other."

"And, who did I chose? Chris over you, Lust over Love."

"What if those roots had decided to take revenge? What if they killed you before you could walk out of that barn?" She finished. "This is Haven after all, where the impossible becomes the possible."

"Audrey, that doesn't matter anymore. We can go back to the Keegan's barn someday, and walk out together if you want." He continued. "And, I would really like to continue this conversation with your eyes open."

"Stop talking like you're alive." She said harshly, still refusing to look at him. "You died in my arms on Main Street. Remember?"

"The hit and run driver broke through the wooden barricade. Leaving a chunk of wood impaled in you."

"And, what hurts the most is that it took you dying. She said, fresh tears falling down her face. "For me to admit to myself that I love you. That I want to be with you."

The response she got was Nathan pulling her onto his lap, and kissing her. Audrey was shocked at first. However, all coherent thoughts left her, the moment Nathan's lips were on hers. And, their tongues slowly tangoed together. Audrey could still feel his lips on hers, after the kiss ended.

Nathan's lips and that mind-blowing kiss had felt real. The sounds of both of them, trying to catch their breaths sounded real. The feel of his arms tightening around her and, his forehead leaning against hers felt real. The small shiver that ran through his body whenever they had skin-to-skin contact was definitely real. What the Hell was going on? Was this some cruel joke? Or, was Nathan really alive?

"Audrey," He finally said, more like begging her. "Come back to me. Please, wake up."

_**I'm holding on **_

_**(I'm still holding) **_

_**I'm holding on **_

_**(I'm still holding) **_

_**I'm holding on **_

_**(I'm still holding)  
><strong>_

_**I'm barely holding on to you**_


	5. Left Me Here Alone

**AUTHOR'S NOTES: Okay, so I lied. This chapter was long enough to be broken into two. So, this is the second to the last Chapter. Took a little longer to write, and post than I expected. Life and three different scenarios for this chapter got in my way. I couldn't decide on which scenario to use, very frustrating. So, I just picked one. **

"Come back to me." Nathan begged her again. "Please, wake up."

"What do you mean, wake up? I am awake." She insisted, but began to panic when she no longer felt his warm and safe embrace. Audrey quickly opened her eyes and saw nothing, but an empty space. She was all alone.

However, she wasn't crying. No, she was confused. One minute Nathan's there, kissing her begging her to wake up. She had never kissed Nathan before, so there was no way she could have imagined a kiss that mind blowing. She felt the small shiver that ran through his body, when they had skin-to-skin contact. He even felt real. But, when she opened her eyes he was gone. What the Hell was happening?

Then, Audrey thought about what Nathan had said. She had been too grief stricken to consider the possibility before. Maybe this was all false hope, but what if it wasn't? What if the last four days, were nothing but a dream?

Had the whole 'Groundhog Day' experience actually traumatized her? Did she have some form of Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome? It wasn't unusual for people that have gone through a traumatic experience, to relive it in their dreams.

And, it didn't help that she blamed herself for not being able to save Anson Shumway. That she felt like a failure. Could it be that she was actually sleeping this whole time? But, she wasn't dreaming about her 'Groundhog Day'. She was adding onto it, like a story.

Could her feeling like she had failed the Troubled, be the cause of all this? That not being able to forgive herself for what happened, was the reason she was stuck here. It would also explain why the Troubles hadn't made an appearance in any way, shape or form during the last four days.

For a brief moment she thought about asking Dave and Vince, if there had ever been any cases of people claiming to be stuck in their dreams for a few days. She even thought about telling Duke her theory. But, they would just think she was hallucinating. That it was only her grief talking, and giving her false hope. Especially, since Nathan's Memorial Service was suppose to be tomorrow.

She needed to keep this to herself, to save her from any further embarrassment if she was wrong. Audrey had to admit that saying this out loud, sounded like a hallucination even to her. But, this was Haven. So, anything was possible.

If it really was failure that was keeping her here, then she needed to make her peace with it. Or, maybe she was just kidding herself. Either way she had to try. She had to know if she was stuck in a dream, or if this was reality. It was the only way she could move on. And, she knew that her 'Groundhog Day' held the answer.

Audrey closed her eyes again, replaying each 'death' she had witnessed that day in her mind. But, the memories seemed to blur together. Why couldn't she remember clearly? The headache that she had tried to ignore intensified, the more she tried to focus. Until, it was a sharp stabbing pain. The last image she saw, before she passed out was of her and Nathan. They were standing on the back porch of the Grey Gull. He was telling her that the 'Troubled' make their own choices, and that she couldn't save everyone. And, that she could never fail him.

She woke up feeling a little disoriented, but noticed her surroundings. How did she end up in the Hospital? Then, it all came into focus. Going to her thinking spot, Nathan showing up and talking to her, the theory she had come up with from their conversation, trying to remember her 'Groundhog Day' and finally the sharp, stabbing pain in her head. She must've passed out from the pain, and someone found her.

Audrey knew she couldn't stay in the Hospital. If she couldn't remember what happened that day clearly, then she knew what she needed to do. She didn't want to do this, but she had no other choice. She would have to literally relive her 'Groundhog Day'. She was alone in the room, so no one could stop her from leaving. Audrey started to take the IV in her arm out, when she heard the bathroom door open.

"And, where do you think you're going?" Duke asked, quickly walking to the bed and gently grabbing her hand. "You're staying right here."

"Duke, I'm fine."

"That's why two fishermen found you passed out on the ground." He replied, sitting on the edge of the bed. "Yea, you sound really fine to me."

"I'm fine." Audrey insisted. "I need to get out of here, so I can figure out what the Hell is going on."

"It was too much stress that put you here in the first place." He said. "You're not leaving, until the doctor clears you."

"Duke, I have a question for you." He stared at her for a moment, noticing how serious she looked and sounded.

"Don't you think it's strange that, the Troubles haven't made an appearance in four days?"

"I would think the Troubles would be coming out at full force," She finished. "Now, that one of the people that helped stop them is dead."

"Maybe they are. But, the rest of the Haven P.D. are actually doing their jobs, and have things under control." Duke said. "Or, maybe they are taking pity on you."

"You mean the Troubles are letting me mourn my loss." Audrey said sarcastically, with a small laugh. "I doubt it."

"Take it from me. It's no fun causing a little trouble," He said. "If the person that normally stops you is, going through their own personal crisis."

"Nice theory." Audrey said. "But, I have another one."

"Let me guess. You saw Nathan, and your theory has something to do with him."

"I thought he was just a hallucination, so I kept my eyes closed." She said. "It would hurt too much to see him, knowing that he was dead."

"I told him I never wanted to see, or sense his presence ever again. Then, he pulled me onto his lap and kissed me."

"He felt so real, and even smelt different." She continued. "He asked me to come back to him, and to wake up."

"But, when I opened my eyes he wasn't there." She finished. "Those few minutes with him felt more real, than anything else in Haven including this conversation."

"Sounds like one hell of a hallucination." Duke said, giving her a smile.

"I'm serious." She said annoyed.

"Okay, tell me your theory."

"I know that this will sound crazy, and that it's only my grief is talking. Maybe I'm just hallucinating, and it's creating false hope." She explained. "But, what if everything I experienced over the last four days was a dream?"

"I think the whole 'Groundhog Day' experience gave me some form of Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome." She continued. "It's not unusual to dream about the traumatic experience."

"During that time, I felt like I had been awake for five days straight. So, my mind and body probably reacted as if I was sleep deprived."

"If I'm right, then I need to figure out what the Hell is going on." She finished. "Before tomorrow or, I might be stuck here."

"Audrey," Duke said, gently squeezing her hand. "I know you blame yourself, but what happened during that day wasn't your fault."

"You weren't the one driving the hit and run car." He continued. "It was an old man, who confused the accelerator with the brakes."

"And, you can't control what people do Troubled or not. Everyone makes their own choices."

Anson Shumway made his own choice. It saved his daughter, and this town." He finished. "But you can't save everyone, Audrey."

She stared at him for a few minutes. The words were similar to Nathan's, but had the same meaning. When did that moment on the porch take place with Nathan, anyway? Was it a real memory, or another hallucination? Duke was starting to get a little worried by her silence and staring.

"I realize that it wasn't my fault," She finally said. "But, that doesn't mean I'm at peace with it."

"I tried replaying that day in my mind. But, it obviously didn't work."

"So, you think that you might be in some kind of coma." Duke said. "And, by reliving that day you will wake up."

"I know that it sounds crazy even for Haven," Audrey said, almost begging him to let her leave. "But, I need to know if this is reality or just a horrible dream."

"It must be hard to be the only person, who knows when things get funky around here."

"Yea, being right all the time it's not always the greatest thing."

"Yea, I know. It's tough for people like you and me." He smiled at her, and she smiled back.

"So, does that mean you believe me?" She asked hopefully.

"After all the crazy shit that we've seen in this town, do you really need to ask me that question?"

"The last four days have been Hell for you, and it wasn't easy watching you go through that pain either." He continued. "If there is a possibility that all of this is only a dream. I don't want you stuck here anymore."

"Because, that means 'Real World' Duke is stuck babysitting Tin Man. And, he is probably a complete mess without you." He finished, and she playfully punched him in his arm. "Just, like you are without him."

"So, you'll let me leave?"

"If I wasn't here you would already be gone." He replied. "Your room is on the first floor, facing the back parking lot. So, it would take a few minutes before anyone realized you were gone."

"Thank You." Audrey said, hugging him.

"Not, so fast." He said, pulling away from her. "I told you I would let you leave, not that I would let you do this alone."

"Not that you even have a choice. I had your car towed back to the Gull. So, you need a getaway car."

"Your clothes are in the closet." He finished, as he helped her remove the few wires that connected her to the medical equipment. "Hurry up and get dressed."

Audrey quickly got changed in the bathroom, while Duke kept look out. Luckily, no one came in the room and they escaped through the window. Duke's Jeep was parked in the back parking lot, and Audrey let out a relieved sigh the moment they got inside it.

Part of her thought that they were going to get caught. Not that the hospital staff could keep her there, anyway. Though, she knew Duke would soon get a call about her disappearance. Five minutes later, they were on Main Street. Duke parked in the first empty parking space he found. Audrey started to open the door, but Duke gently grabbed her arm stopping her.

"If you show any signs of not feeling well, then the trip down memory lane ends." He said, total seriousness in his expression and voice. "You will go home and stay there. No sneaking out."

"Anything else?"

"Yea," He replied. "I have no change for the meter. So, if I get a parking ticket it's your fault. And, it will magically disappear."

"No problem." Audrey smiled at him. "It's a deal." Duke's cell rang while they were getting out of the Jeep. Figures it would take the Hospital, Ten minutes to realize Audrey was missing. He quickly told them he found her, and hung up.

"Okay, so you woke up with the big mistake. And, then went to Career Day." He said, walking towards her. "What happened next?"

Audrey closed her eyes for a moment. She was remembering clearly now. The order of the 'deaths' was Anson Shumway's daughter, Duke, Chris, Nathan and Anson himself. As they visited each 'death site' Audrey found the Truth. Everything happened exactly as she remembered. Not a single detail overlooked, or new memory of that day added. This was Reality, not a Dream.

They walked back to the Jeep in silence. Duke wasn't sure what to say, and didn't want to force her to talk about it. He was afraid this would happen. And, He hated that it only caused her more pain. The ride back to the Gull was silent. Audrey just stared out the window the whole time, trying not to cry. She felt like a complete idiot, but she needed to know the truth. And, she had promised herself that no matter what the outcome was. She would move on, no matter how hard it would be.

The moment that Duke was parked in his parking space Audrey immediately got out, without a word or looking at him. Duke followed her, thinking she was going to her apartment. But, she walked into the bar and straight to the back porch. Leaning against the wall hidden out of sight, eyes closed forcing that false image of her and Nathan on the back porch out of her mind. Duke was about to walk onto the porch, when he heard her began to speak.

"Nathan, I know the truth now." She began. "This is my Reality, not a Dream."

"I know you would want me to move on. But, I can't if I can still sense your presence."

"So, if you love me as much as I love you." She finished. "Please let me go, and stay away." Suddenly, she felt a pair of familiar arms wrapped around her. Audrey tensed for a minute, but slowly relaxed and cried.

**AUTHOR'S NOTE 2#: I wonder how this is all going to end. The ****Good News is that, I'm almost finished with the last chapter. I want to be satisfied with the ending before I post it.**


	6. I May Have Lost My Way Now

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: I want to thank Damonficgirl for her suggestion about making a change to the summary. **

Duke didn't know what to say. 'I'm sorry this wasn't a dream' would only add to her heartbreak, even though he was being sincere. He should have never agreed to help her, and insisted she stayed in the Hospital. But, at least Audrey knew the truth now. Instead, of spending the rest of her life wondering. Still, he hated seeing her in so much pain. So, he just remained silent. Holding her in his arms and, rubbing small comforting circles on her back with his right hand. And, waiting until Audrey was ready to talk.

When her crying finally subsided, Audrey pulled out his embrace. She wiped the tears from her eyes, turning away from him. Her eyes closed and taking a few deep breathes, trying to regain a little of her composure. Duke didn't have to see her face, to know that she was tired. The last four days had not only drained her emotionally, but physically as well.

"Duke, can you do me a favor?" Audrey asked, turning around to face him.

"That's what Little Brother's are for, right." He replied, giving her a smile and she smiled back.

He followed Audrey as she walked back into the bar, out the front door and up the stairs to her apartment. Duke didn't need to ask what the favor was, because he was already going to offer to do it. When they got into the apartment, he noticed that Audrey was trying to avoid looking at the kitchen table. Duke moved until he was standing in front of her. So, he was blocking her view of the urn.

"I'll lock it in my safe." He said.

"Thank you for everything." She said, giving him a hug. "For believing me, trusting me and helping me. I don't think I would've been able to cope with all this, if I didn't have you to lean on."

"No thanks needed. We're in this together, remember."

Audrey released him, and watched as he walked over to the kitchen table. He took off his sweater, and carefully wrapped the urn in it. No one else needed a sneak preview. After everything Audrey had went through today, the last thing she needed was the whole bar whispering or giving her pity looks. She was going to get enough of that tomorrow. No matter how much He, Dave and Vince would try to protect her from it.

"You look exhausted. Try to get some sleep." He said, walking back over to her and kissed her on her forehead.

Audrey was all alone now. She was so tired, yet couldn't sleep. And, she hated it. Because, it meant that she had time to think. About everything that had happened over the last four days. And, the delusional crazy mess she has been especially today. She felt like a complete idiot now, thinking that this was all just a dream.

She shook her head, trying to rid her mind of these thoughts. Then, her eyes drifted to her piano. Audrey didn't care if she only knew one song. Or, that is was the only faint memory she had when she was Lucy Ripley. She needed a distraction. She would play the song until the memories of the last four days, faded enough for her to get some sleep. No matter how restless it would be.

Audrey sat down at the piano, and was in the middle of playing the first round of 'Your Song' by Elton John. When, she heard her wind chimes chime loudly. Only, it wasn't from the wind. No, someone or something had hit them. However, she heard no footsteps or the sound of something falling onto the deck. She stood up quickly crossed the room, and grabbed her gun off the nightstand next to her bed. It may be nothing, but she wasn't taking any chances.

She quickly opened one of the French style doors that, led outside onto the deck. She did a quick sweep of the deck anyway, but nothing was there. She lowered her gun, and leaned against the wall next to the wind chimes. Audrey wanted to laugh at herself, for her first instinct to grab her gun. She decided to blame it on the horrible day she was having. Just another hallucination brought on by grief.

Suddenly, she felt tired. The adrenaline that, she had been running on slowly seep out of her body. Audrey pushed herself off the wall purposely hitting the wind chimes with her right hand, as she walked back into her apartment shutting the door behind her. She placed the gun back on the nightstand, and lay down on the bed. After moving around for a few minutes, she found a comfortable spot in the center of the bed.

For a moment she thought, or rather hoped that it was Nathan. That he had been stubborn ignoring her request, so they could see each other one last time. And, say goodbye. She shook her head, trying to push those thoughts away. Ghost or hallucination, seeing him was the last thing she needed. Nathan was dead, and she needed to face reality. Audrey knew she wouldn't be able to help anyone, or discover all of Haven's secrets. Until, she got some help for herself.

Maybe she should consider making an appointment with a Psychiatrist. Talking to someone outside of the situation might help. If the Chief had a Cleaner, that helped with the aftermath of Trouble cases. Then, there was a good possibility he also had a Psychiatrist for the Troubled. She could start the healing process, and move on. Audrey wanted and needed these hallucinations of Nathan to stop, but the memories of him to never die. As she drifted off to sleep, she thought she felt someone kiss her cheek.

The feeling of someone gently shaking her woke Audrey up. It was Duke with a takeout bag from the Gull and three bottles of Nathan's favorite beer. She slowly sat up and looked at the alarm clock on her nightstand, which read 5PM.

"Sorry, to wake you but I need to make sure you eat." He said.

"Thank You." Audrey replied, giving him a small grateful smile.

"No thanks needed." He said, walking over to the kitchen table. But, Audrey stopped him.

"Let's eat on the deck." Duke followed Audrey onto the deck, and set the bag and beers on the table between the two lounge chairs.

"Hamburgers and fries." He said, taking the two Styrofoam containers out of the bag. Handing her one of the containers, but she didn't take it.

"I can go get you something else." He said, starting to put the container back in the bag.

"No," She said, taking the container out of his hands setting it down on the table. "The food is fine."

"Do you want to talk about it?" He asked, standing in front of her chair. "Or, do you still need some more time alone?"

"I don't want you to leave. Sit down and eat."

There was a comfortable silence between them, as they ate. Duke knew that it was tomorrow that was bothering her. Tomorrow bothered him as well. But, he wasn't going to push her into talking about it. He would let her be the one to start that conversation.

"Duke," Audrey said, finally breaking the silence. "What if I can't say anything tomorrow?" Duke looked at her but said nothing. And, Audrey knew he was giving her the chance to fully say what she needed to. Before, he gave his opinion.

"I'm his best friend and partner. We're more than just partners." And, Duke smiled at her correction.

People will expect me to say something." She continued. "I know it would be horrible, if I didn't say anything."

"But, I just don't think I can do it."

"Audrey," Duke said, reaching across the table and gently squeezing her hand. "You don't need to say anything tomorrow."

"If anyone has a problem with it," He finished. "I will kindly ask them to leave."

"You will kindly ask them to leave." Audrey repeated doubtfully.

"Okay. I'll tell them to get the Hell out." He replied. "Is that better?"

"Much."

"Can I ask you a question?" Duke asked, and Audrey nodded. "Why did you ask him to leave, when you're not ready to let him go?

"You're the only person I know, who has a high tolerance for the weird and funky. Would it really be that bad if Nathan stayed, even if it was only in spirit form?"

"If he stayed, it wouldn't be the same." She explained. "It would be literally living with a ghost. I can't touch or even sense him all the time."

"It wouldn't change the fact that he was dead."

"Seeing each other, but not being able to actually be with each other would become unbearable." She continued. "And, eventually we would end up resenting each other."

"I can't live my life like that. It wouldn't be fair to me or Nathan." She finished. "So, I made the right but hard decision. That's why I asked him to let me go, and to stay away."

"Nathan wouldn't want that either." Duke said, squeezing her hand again before letting it go. "So, let's make a toast."

"Here's to Nathan, our best friend no one can ever replace and will be greatly missed." He said seriously, holding up his beer bottle. "And, taking life one day at a time."

"To Nathan and taking life one day at a time." Audrey repeated, tapping her beer bottle against his. Then, both of them tapped Nathan's beer bottle.

They spent the rest of the night, talking about Nathan. Audrey told him about the crazy cases even for Haven, that she and Nathan worked on. Duke told her about growing up with Nathan. How beautiful, nice and caring Nathan's mother was. A subject Nathan never seemed to want to talk about, and Audrey wondered about.

Duke even admitted some of the jokes and pranks that, he did to Nathan and regretted now. Which earned him several ear flicks, punches in his right arm, and 'You're lucky I wasn't here' threats from Audrey. The only tears shed were from laughter. It took their minds off what tomorrow would bring. Until, Duke's cell phone rang.

"Closing time and not everyone wants to leave." Duke said, with a sigh. "Sometimes, it's a pain in the ass to be a legit business owner."

"Midnight already." Audrey said sadly, helping Duke put the two empty containers and beer bottles back into the takeout bag."

"Audrey," Duke said, grabbing the bag. "If you don't want to be alone, you're welcome on the Cape Rouge. Or, I can stay here."

"Thank you," Audrey said. Standing up and giving him a hug, then a kiss on the cheek. "But, I'll be fine."

"You sure?"

"Goodnight, Duke."

Audrey watched, as he walked down the stairs and disappeared around the building. She locked the doors then, walked over to her closet. Taking out the red flannel shirt, that Nathan had bought her. A few weeks after, she had arrived in Haven. So, she could start fitting in with the Locals.

Audrey couldn't help but smile at the memory. She wondered from time to time what he would think, if He knew it was one of her favorite things to sleep in. Or, even better his reaction if he saw her wearing it. The smile left her face when she realized that, She would never know the answer.

After turning of the lights, she got into bed. Lying in the center of the bed, eyes closed trying not to think about tomorrow. Slowly she started to drift off to sleep, when her wind chimes chimed loudly. Like before there were no footsteps or the sound of something falling onto the deck.

Audrey quickly grabbed her gun off the nightstand, without turning on the lights. The moonlight was bright enough for her to walk to the door, without bumping into anything. She turned on a light switch next to the doors, and the floodlights for the deck came on. Like before she quickly opened the door, but nothing was there. After a quick sweep of the deck, she walked back to the doorway.

Only to be face to face, or rather face to chest with Nathan. She just stood there staring at him, as he gently took the gun out of her hand. Grabbing her hand, and leading her back into the apartment. Placing the gun on the shelf, that was next to the door. Nathan turned just in time to catch the fist, aimed at his face with one hand. Wrapping his other arm around her waist and, pulling her close to him.

"That was a nice welcome." He said, smiling at her sounding a little amused. Audrey started to pull away from him, but Nathan tightened his arms around her.

"Let me go." Audrey demanded, still trying to get out of his embrace. All the sadness, heartbreak and anger she was feeling clearly showing in her voice and on her face. And, it killed Nathan on the inside to see her this way.

"No."

"You're not real, you're dead." She said, closing her eyes. "This is reality, not a dream. I know that now."

"And, when I open my eyes you will be gone." Audrey felt him release her, and immediately missed the comfort of his warm and safe embrace. She pushed that feeling away, as she silently reminded herself that Nathan was dead. When she slowly opened her eyes again, she was surprised to see him still standing there.

"So, that's what you really think?" He asked. "That this is your reality. And, I'm just a ghost or hallucination."

"What else could you be?" Audrey said. "The Real Nathan would respect my wishes. He would let me move on, not cause me more pain."

"You're right. I would do that, if I was dead."

"But, you are. You just said proved it, by saying what I want to hear." She continued, knowing he wasn't real. But, maybe saying this out loud would help stop whatever he was.

"I want and need you to be alive and, here with me. But, this is reality." She finished. "Ghost or hallucination, this needs to stop."

"It's harder to breakthrough to you, than I thought." He said.

Trying to reason with her obviously wasn't working. Julia was right. The trauma Audrey suffered during her 'Groundhog Day' experience, combined with her being unconscious for four days straight. Had clouded her judgment, making her think this dream was her reality. He needed to figure out another way to get through to her, before he woke up. Or, he might not get another chance.

"Enough!" She said harshly. "Just go away…Please."

"I just want to talk to you." He said. "If you still think I'm a hallucination after that, then I promise I will leave. And, you'll never see me again." Audrey just stared at him for a moment. She must be crazy for considering doing this. But, she would do almost anything to stop this.

"I can't believe I'm giving into a hallucination." Audrey said sarcastically.

"Audrey, we're best friends?" She noticed how he looked, and sounded a little desperate. As if it was the most important question that, he needed an answer to.

"Yes." She finally said, wondering just what he was getting at.

"We're partners?"

"Yes."

"We're more than just partners?" He asked, trying to resist the urge to touch her.

"Are we more than just partners?" He repeated again, when she didn't answer him the first time.

"Yes."

"You trust your best friend, partner and the man that loves you?" He asked, giving her that half grin/half smile that she loved. "Do you trust me?"

"You know I do." She replied.

"Then, you know that I would never lie to you." He continued. "You're the only person I absolutely trust."

"I would want and, let you mourn and move on. I wouldn't spend all of my free time over the last four days, trying to breakthrough to you."

"If you really think that I'm dead, and that this is your reality. " He finished. "If I am just a ghost or hallucination, then why would I willingly let Duke use a taser on me?"

"What?" Audrey asked, confused and curious now. If this was a hallucination it was either very vivid, or she was officially a delusional crazy mess. But, she still refused to give into the hope that Nathan was real. She had already made a fool out of herself more than once over the last four days. If this make-believe conversation needed to, happen for her to move on. Then, she would listen to what Nathan had to say.

"I let Duke use a taser on me." He repeated, no longer resisting the urge to touch her. As if his touch would help her see the truth. His hands cupping her face, so she wouldn't turn away from him.

"I needed to stay knocked out long enough, to find you and bring you home." Instead of pushing him away, Audrey just stared at him. Noticing something she hadn't before.

To anyone else, it would look like Nathan was completely worn out. But, Audrey knew better. They might have known each other for only a year, but they could read each other like books. As if they had known each other for a lifetime. She could tell what he was feeling, just by looking into those gorgeous blue-grey eyes. It was a mixture of many different emotions. Worry, sadness, exhaustion, desperation, but hope and most importantly love. But, she reminded herself again that he wasn't real.

"I know," He said, giving her a small smile. "I look like Hell."

"What do you want?" She demanded, changing the subject as she pushed him away from her. Nathan let her, but only stayed an arm's length away from her.

"Do you remember the last real place you were, before all this started?" He asked.

Audrey thought about the image she saw that afternoon. They were standing on the back porch of the Grey Gull. They were talking about her 'Groundhog Day' and, how she felt she failed by not being able to save Anson Shumway. He was telling her that the 'Troubled' make their own choices, and that she couldn't save everyone. And, that she could never fail him. Audrey pushed that thought away. However, Nathan noticed how she adverted looking into his eyes.

"You remember." He said.

"No, I don't." She said a little too harshly. "How could I remember something that never happened?

"I won't deny that I thought this was all a dream. I thought it was failure that was keeping me stuck here."

"I literally relived my 'Groundhog Day' thinking it would help me forgive myself. That, I would finally be able to wake up and go home."

"But, all it proved was that I remembered every detail of that day clearly. And, that I'm turning into a delusional crazy mess."

"Now, this conversation is over." She finished, pushing past him and walking over to her bed. "I'm going back to sleep, and when I wake up. Hopefully, whatever you are will be gone."

Nathan didn't want to do this, not while she was sleeping. Someday he planned to, but she gave him no choice. He had to tell her something personal. Something she didn't know about him, and couldn't hallucinate about. Nathan trapped her between his body and the nearest wall. Audrey was shocked at first, but glared at him and she tried to push him away. But, Nathan wouldn't budge.

"Do you think that you're the only person," He began. "Who worries about failing the Troubled?

"I worry about failing this whole town. I worry that I'm failing my father." The look on his face was serious, yet the tone of his voice was soft. "Sometimes, I feel like I'm holding this town together with my own bare hands. And, that the only thing holding me together is you."

"I'm not saying that I need you to help me solve every case, Troubled or not. I would and somehow have managed without you. That's what I've been doing for the last four days. The Troubles have been more active, since you've been unconscious. Duke has helped me with some cases. But, I asked him to mainly watch over you."

"I want you here with me, Audrey. You're not just my best friend or partner. I love you. I should've told you months ago, but I needed to be sure. I needed to know that I love you not because you're the only thing I can feel but, for the woman that you are. I want you to have no doubts that, I love you for you."

Audrey just stared at him for a moment. Letting his words combined with tone of his voice and expression on his face sink in. He looked desperate but determine. As if he was fighting, for the most important thing in his life. He was fighting for her.

Nathan stared back at her, never leaving her eyes. He had just opened up his heart for her, and she hadn't said anything. Did she still think that this was her reality? He didn't bother thinking about what to do next, to convince her that it wasn't. He just did it.

Nathan wrapped on arm around her waist, while his free hand moved her right hand under his grey T-shirt. He placed her hand over his heart, his hand resting on top of hers. Audrey's eyes widen when she felt how warm his skin was, and she could feel his heartbeat. She smiled when she heard the small gasp escape his lips, letting her know that he could feel his heartbeat as well.

There was a moment of silence between them, as they just stared at their favorite shades of blue. Audrey's hand was a little shaky, as she moved to cup his cheek. She watched Nathan's eyes close, relishing the feel of her touch. She felt that familiar shiver run through his body, caused by their skin-to-skin contact.

Her right hand stayed under his shirt, and she entwined their fingers together. Nathan immediately tightened his arm around her, pulling her close. Audrey wrapped her other arm around his neck, drawing small patterns with her fingers on the nape of his neck. Her head rested on his chest, just above their hands.

All doubts of this being just a dream or hallucination disappeared. As, his scent consumed her. It was an irresistible mixture of Pancakes, his aftershave, and something uniquely Nathan. This was nothing like her previous encounters with Nathan, over the last four days. No, this was very real. Nathan was safe, alive and well. And, he had been waiting for four long days for her to wake up.

There was a comfortable moment of silence between them, as they held each other. As if they were each other's lifelines, which wasn't too far from the truth. Both of them were crying tears of happiness, relief, for finally finding each other and love.

"Do I pass?" Nathan finally asked, kissing the top of her head and rubbing small comforting circles on her lower back.

"Yes." Audrey replied, smiling at him. Pulling away from him just enough to look at him, and moving her hand to wipe a tear off his face. Then, she kissed him. Pouring every bit of love, and passion she has for him into that kiss. Letting him know that she knew he was real. Until, the need for air made it presence know. She rested her forehead against his staring into his eyes, as both of them tried to catch their breaths.

"Finally." Nathan said, sounding relieved and smiling back at her removing their hands from underneath his shirt. So, he could hold her closer to him.

Audrey rested her head against his chest again. Closing her eyes, and concentrating on the wonderful sound of his strong heartbeat. Suddenly, his heartbeat was replaced by something that sounded like a machine beeping. For a moment the fear that she had hallucinated all of this, filled her mind and heart. That she was really in her apartment and, it was her alarm clock going off. As if it was signaling the beginning of, the worst day of her life.

Audrey reached out her right hand to stop the annoying beeping. When she felt someone gently grab, and squeeze her hand. Surprised, she opened her eyes. Only to shut them against, what seemed like a bright light.

"No Audrey!" A familiar but worried voice said, though she couldn't quit place who it was. But, she felt the hand tapping on her face. "Open those beautiful blue eyes." Audrey slowly opened her eyes, giving her eyes time to adjust. She was both surprised and, disappointed by what she saw.

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: Yes, I know don't say it I'm EVIL! But, this last chapter is so long, that it could be broken into two. I left you guys hanging for so long that I wanted to give you something to read. And, according to my Word program, this part alone was nine pages. But, I promise to have the last chapter up before the end of this week. Feel free to express your frustration in your reviews. I do appreciate your patience **


	7. Haven't Forgotten My Way Home

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: Okay, time to wrap this story up. Sorry about the long wait. My USB port with the last chapter on it broke, and I had to start all over. A little bit of writers block for this story, also got in the way. So, unfortunately this isn't the original last chapter. But, for those of you who were patient enough to stick with this story. I hope this was worth the wait. **

Audrey tried to look at her surroundings, and figure out where she was. But, it was difficult when someone was tapping her in the face. However, she could feel that she was lying down on something hard. And, the annoying beeping had stopped. Then, the voice and face came into focus. She was both surprised and disappointed at first. But, now shocked and confused could be added to that list.

"Let me help you stand up." The man bending over her said, removing his hand from her face. Standing up and offering his hand to her.

Audrey took his hand, and let go once she steadied herself. She stood there for a moment, looking at her surroundings. She was standing in the middle of Main Street. And, judging by the sun, it was the middle of the day. But, the street was completely deserted. No cars or people, other than to man standing next to her. What the Hell was going on?

The last thing she remembered, it was the middle of the night and she was with Nathan in her apartment. Was this really just all a dream like Nathan said? Was it possible to have a dream within a dream? Or, maybe she had finally reached her breaking point. And, the conversation with Nathan was just a major hallucination. No matter what the case may be, she had had enough of this 'is this the real life or is this just fantasy' crap. However, she would just go with it for now. Because, he was the last person she expected to see. Anson Shumway.

"What's going on?" She asked confused, curious and maybe a little scared.

"You were only half right when you said, failure was the reason you were stuck here." He explained. "The other part is something much stronger than failure."

"Something you must face on your own and accept. It's Fear. Fear that you will fail another 'Troubled' person or worse, the people who love you. You can't save everyone."

"But, that's why I'm here." Audrey interrupted him, holding back the tears forming in her eyes.

"I appreciate that you tried to save me," Anson continued. "But, I made my own decision. And, I wouldn't let you stop me."

"Even if you reached me in time, I would've pushed you out of the way. Please stop blaming yourself, for a decision that you couldn't control."

"You helped me, by solving the case. You were able to get through to me. If you hadn't found me, then Haven would still be in an endless time loop. And, you would have to watch someone new die every day."

"You helped me save my daughter, everyone who died in the repeats and this town. Now, it's time for me to help you."

"It's time you woke up from this nightmare. You have people who love you, waiting for you to come back to them." He finished. "It's time for you to go home, Audrey."

"But, I don't know how." Audrey admitted scared.

"Don't be scared. You haven't forgotten your way home." Anson said, standing in front of her with his hands on her shoulders. "Close your eyes, clear you mind of everything else. And, just concentrate on that day."

Audrey did as she was told, and suddenly everything became clear. She remembered what really happened that horrible day. The order all the 'deaths' happened. Seeing each person alive again, and her reaction to that. Not being able to save Anson from the decision he made to stop the repeats. Standing on the back porch of the Grey Gull with Nathan after, the whole horrible experience ended. And, him telling her that she could never fail him.

Suddenly, the annoying beeping sound was back. Audrey opened her eyes, turning her head to the left noticing a heart monitoring machine. And, Duke sitting in a white plastic chair a few inches away from the bed.

"Duke…." Her throat felt dry, causing her voice to crack a little.

"Audrey!" Duke said, pure relief showing on his face and in his voice. Knocking over the chair as he quickly stood up, and walked over to the bed. Leaning down, and giving her a small hug. Trying to avoid the wires attached to her.

"Where's Nathan?"

"Just relax." He replied, releasing her. Quickly grabbing the bottle of water, that was on the floor, next to the chair. Untwisting the cap, and holding it up to her mouth.

"Take a sip, slowly." Audrey was annoyed, but let him help her. He wasn't answering her question.

"Duke, where is Nathan."

"Don't ever do that again, please." He said, closing the bottle. "You don't know how much we were worried, but…" He was interrupted by pain behind his left ear.

"Ow!" He said, rubbing his ear. "You just wake up, and the first thing you do is flick my ear."

"Duke, where is Nathan?" She demanded, stressing every word. And, He could see the fear showing in her eyes and voice.

"Not Dead." A voice from the corner of the room said a little gruff, as if the person had just woken up. Audrey watched with tears in her eyes, as Nathan stood up from the recliner in the corner of the room. She hadn't noticed him before, because Duke was blocking her view.

Nathan walked over to her, sitting as close as he could to her on the bed. Smiling, he cupped her face in his hands wiping her tears away. There was a comfortable moment of silence between them, as they just sat there staring at their favorite shades of blue. Oblivious to everything that was around them.

Audrey's hands were a little shaky, as she removed his hands from her face. He was a little confused and hurt at first. Until, he saw what she was doing. Audrey guided his hands, under the hem of the hospital shirt she was wearing.

She watched Nathan's eyes close, relishing the feel of her skin. She felt that familiar shiver run through his body, caused by their skin- to-skin contact. And, enjoyed the feeling of his hands slowly skimming pass her sides before, finally resting on her lower back. Realizing that, she needed his touch just as much as he needed hers.

"You're real." Audrey finally said relieved. Releasing the breath she was unaware she had been holding, and cupping his face in his hands.

"You're finally awake." Nathan replied, pulling her close to him as the wires connected to her would allow. As she wiped away his tears, then she kissed him.

Longer and deeper than, their previous kisses. As if they hadn't seen each other in four years, not four days. No, this kiss spoke volumes, Happiness, Relief, Hope, Longing, Passion, Desire and Love. A kiss that felt more like Forever. They never wanted that kiss to end, but the need for air made its presence known. Or, rather someone was stupid enough to interrupt them.

"This is a beautiful moment." Duke said smiling. "Really, it is." He had been taking a cell phone video, from the moment Nathan woke up.

"Crying will be tolerated this time, so no need to feel ashamed Tin Man."

"But, Audrey you just woke up from a coma." He finished, with a sly smile on his face. Showing he was purposely being a smartass. "Shouldn't you be cleared by a Doctor, before you engage in this kind of activity?"

Audrey and Nathan turned and looked at Duke, still holding each other as if their lives depended on it. Though, they both looked exhausted as Hell. And, it was obvious that they both had been crying. Audrey still managed to look annoyed, and Nathan glared at the unwelcomed interruption.

"Okay." Duke said. Holding up both his hands in an 'I surrender 'position. Slowly backing up towards the door while, still taking the video. "I'll just go find Julia, and let her know you're awake."

Nathan watched Duke walk out the door, until he felt pain in his left ear. Though, he refused to let go of Audrey. He relished any skin-to-skin connect with her. Even, if it was an annoying painful flick behind his ear.

"That's for not being where I could see you, when I woke up." Audrey said, answering his question before he could ask it. Sounding more relieved than angry.

"Sorry. I wanted to move the recliner right next to the bed. " Nathan said, giving her an apologetic smile. "But, the hospital staff refused to arrange the medical equipment so it could fit. Even, for the Chief-of-Police."

"I suppose all of this was needed to keep me alive." Audrey said, looking at all the equipment attached to her.

"That's not funny." Nathan said, and she noticed the haunted look in his eyes. Audrey could tell that it must've been one of the scenarios that, He thought about during the last four days. And, she instantly regretted what she said.

"I'm sorry." Audrey wanted to sit on his lap, to hold him close and reassure him that she was alive, safe and with him. But, all the wires connected to her prevented that. She would have to settle for cupping his face and, the feel of his hands of her lower back for now.

She caressed his cheeks, slowly moving her hands down his face. Nathan closed his eyes again at the simple, yet so powerful touch. Her hands reached his jaw line, and she traced along it with her thumbs.

Her hands left his face, and he immediately opened his eyes at the loss of her touch. Only to close them again, when he felt her arms tightened around him. And, her head rested in the crook of his neck. Her right hand drawing small patterns, with her fingers on the nape of his neck.

"Thank you for finding me." As she let the wonderful scent of Pancakes, his aftershave, and something uniquely Nathan completely consume her.

"Did you ever doubt I wouldn't?" He asked, kissing the top of her head.

"It was just so real. I got a glimpse of what life would be without you." She said, feeling his arms tighten around her. "It hurt so much. And, I was a complete mess. I don't know how many times I cried, in front of Duke in my dream or rather nightmare."

"I know," He explained. "That's why I kept trying to get through to you."

"You may have been unconscious, but whatever you were experiencing was showing on your face. And, sometimes you would talk in your sleep."

"Mostly it would be to Duke, which made sense. He was the person that watched over you most of the time."

"It still hurt that you were pushing me away," He continued. "Even though, you were unconsciously doing it."

"Then, we found out why. That you thought I was dead." Nathan paused for a moment, and Audrey understood why. It was something that, they both didn't want to think about.

"And, it was hurting you that you could sense me. So, Julia suggested that I stayed away. That, it might help bring you out of the coma."

"It hurt like Hell, and seemed like the longest two days of my life. But, I would do anything to help you. The only bright side is I got the finish a home improvement project. I had been working on while you were sleeping.

"The whole downstairs of the Chief's… I mean my house is now an open floor plan." He finished. "Apparently, sledgehammers and walls do not mix well together."

Audrey pulled away from him, just enough to see his face. She was shocked and 'I'm sorry' didn't really seem like the right thing to say. He had destroyed part of his house, because of her. But, Nathan could see it in her eyes.

"It's okay. Think of it as more like therapy. It helped me vent." He said, giving her a reassuring smile. "I'm sure the Rev's followers, were just waiting for me to have a breakdown. Easier to get me removed as Chief-of-Police."

"If it makes you feel better," He finished. "You can help with the plans for renovations. Just as long as you, don't pick out any 'Girly colors' to paint the walls." And, she flicked his left ear again.

"Doesn't feel good, does it Tin Man?" Duke said, walking back into the room just in time to see the ear flick.

"Someone has to keep you two boys in line, right?" A voice said from behind Duke. And, Audrey smiled when she saw Julia.

"You know when I came back in town on Wednesday afternoon. I was expecting maybe a little welcome home party or girl's night out." Julia said, smiling at her. "Sharing a few margaritas, and catching up on the gossip."

"But, instead I find out that you are in the Hospital in a coma. After Nathan explained to me what happened, the diagnosis changed. You weren't actually in a coma, but sleep deprived. It's not an uncommon side effect, after going through a traumatic experience."

"And, from what you were saying in your sleep. We could tell you were stuck in a 'Dream' or 'Nightmare' version of Haven." She continued. "Some of things you said proved that, you could hear us."

"You included some of what we said into your 'Dream world', but perceived it differently. Adding onto that horrible day, like a story. And, the more you were stuck there. The more the lines between what was real, and what was fantasy began to twist and collide."

"And, the reason why you thought Nathan was dead." Nathan suddenly felt Audrey's arms tighten around him, as Julia said that.

"At first I thought it would be best if Nathan stayed away for a few days. But, then you mentioned the urn. And, we had to bring you out of it."

The days in your 'Dream Haven', coincided with the days in the 'Real Haven'." She finished. "If you had to go through that Memorial Service, then there was a good chance you would slip into a real coma."

"But, you have to admit that there was a bright side to all this." Duke said smiling. "I got to taser Nathan, which I may have had a little too much fun doing. And, Chris Brody has a broken jaw."

"What?" Audrey asked surprised, looking at Duke and back at Nathan.

"Accidents happen." Nathan replied calmly.

"Nathan, you punched him." Audrey said stating the obvious, a little shocked but trying not to laugh.

"I've had some really bad breakups." Duke said. "But, breaking up with someone in your sleep is a little harsh."

"I walked into the room, and he was shaking you. Trying to wake you up because, you told him that you were in love me." Nathan explained, unable to hide his smile. "I was pissed off and defending the woman I love. He's just lucky that you told me to stop."

"Turns out you don't go all 'Man Crush' over him. If you're pissed off and hate him." Duke said laughing. "Too bad you weren't awake to see it. Good thing I recorded the whole thing on my cell phone." Reaching into his right sweater pocket, and taking out his cell phone.

"It will have to wait until later, Duke." Julia said, pushing the nurse call button on the hospital bed. Ordering a nurse to come and, help her detach the unnecessary medical equipment from Audrey.

Duke and a reluctant Nathan moved out of the way. Fifteen minutes later, any protocol needed for coma patients that just woke up was finished. Leaving Audrey attached to the necessary equipment that monitored her vital signs.

Now, Nathan was sitting behind Audrey on the bed, his arms wrapped around her. Audrey let out a small content sigh, as she leaned against him. Enjoying the feeling of being in his arms, and no longer stuck in that nightmare. But, the last thing either of them wanted to do was sleep.

"So, do I pass?" Audrey asked hopefully. "Can I go home now?"

"Sorry," Julia replied. "But, you're staying overnight for observation."

"Really, I'm fine. I'm sure someone else needs this bed or room," She insisted. "Not to mention, the delicious hospital food." The look on her face like, as if she smelt something disgusting. Adding a small shudder to emphasize her words.

"Keep acting like a Drama Queen," Julia said playfully. "And, I won't sneak you in your favorite cupcake and coffee later."

"Touché Doctor Carr," Audrey replied, acting like she was defeated. "Touché."

"Now that that's settled, you need to rest. So, everyone not named Nathan has to leave for now."

"What if I don't want to leave?" Duke asked playfully.

"That puppy dog eyes expression isn't going to work, Duke." Julia said. "Doctor's orders, you need to leave."

"Oh, you want to play Doctor?" Duke said teasingly, wrapping one arm around her shoulders. "Why didn't say so in the first place? Where's the nearest supply closet?" Julia responded by elbowing him hard in his right side, but smiling at the same time.

"I love it when women play hard to get." Duke said with a smirk, as Julia pushed him out the door.

Audrey and Nathan just sat there for a few minutes, enjoying the comfortable silence when Audrey tried to stifle a yawn.

"Lie down and try to get some real sleep." Nathan said. He reluctantly removed his arms from around her, and moved off the bed. But, Audrey immediately grabbed his left hand before his nerves could go numb.

"I'm just going to move the recliner next to the bed." He said, smiling and gently squeezing her hand. "I don't want another ear flick, for not being the first thing you see when you wake up."

"Don't you think I had enough sleep?" Audrey said, smiling back at him. "Besides, you look like you could use some sleep yourself."

"And, I'll feel better if you were lying right next to me when I woke up." Moving over to, make room for him on the bed.

Nathan smiled back, walking to the other side of the bed picking up the chair Duke had knocked over. Sat down, quickly taken off his boots. Then, carefully lay down next to her. It was a tight but not uncomfortable fit. Even if it were uncomfortable, neither of them was willing to move. There was a comfortable moment of silence between them, as they stared into each other's eyes.

"It wasn't just that horrible day that, kept me stuck in that nightmare." Audrey finally said, breaking the silence. "At first, I thought it was failure. But, I was only half right."

"Before, I woke up I spoke with Anson Shumway. He made me realize that, it was fear that was holding me there as well."

"Fear that I would fail another 'Troubled' person, or someone I love." She continued. "I was finally able to let go of all the guilt and blame I felt, for not being able to save him. Or, anyone else that 'died' during those repeats."

"I remember everything that happened that day clearly." She finished. "And, I finally found my way home."

"Audrey, I love you." Nathan said seriously, but Audrey noticed he sounded a little unsure as well. "But, I'm not going to force you into anything you're not ready for."

"You just broke up with Brody, and after everything that happened to you recently. Even though, we have been open with our feelings for each other. I'll understand if you need space."

"But," He finished. "I need to know if you still want 'us' to happen, when you're ready."

Audrey smiled at him then, slowly moved her left hand under his grey T-shirt. Just like he did when, he had entered her dream. She watched his face, enjoying his reaction to her touch. His eyes closed, and the familiar small shiver that ran through his body. Letting her know, that he could really feel her touch.

She placed her hand over his heart, his hand resting on top of hers. She smiled when she heard the small gasp escape his lips, letting her know that he could feel his heartbeat as well. Audrey was glad she was the only one that could give that to him. And, she was more than happy to oblige him. She wondered what she did to deserve, to have this amazing man in her life.

"I wonder the same thing about you." Nathan said looking at her, making Audrey actually blushed. A little embarrassed, that she had said her thought out loud.

"You know me well enough, to know I'm no good with relationships. My friendship with you is the longest relationship that, I've had in my life." It's too important to me. I can't lose you."

"Damn!" She said, noticing the expression on his face. "I'm no good at this. Nathan, what I'm trying to say…"

"It's okay. I understand." Nathan said. Trying not to show, just how much her rejection was hurting him. "Our friendship is too important to me, too. I don't want….I can't lose you either."

"I love you, too." She quickly blurted out, as she entwined their fingers together. "And, I definitely want to be an 'us'. " She smiled when she felt Nathan squeeze her hand, and the hurt on his face quickly fade into a smile.

"But, we should take this one day at a time. Do you want there to be boundaries, until then?" She finished. "I mean….can I still hold your hand, hug you and kiss you?"

"Anytime you want." Nathan replied, centimeters away from her lips.

"Good." Then, she kissed him.

"I'm sorry I made you worry." She said when, the kiss ended. Snuggling into him, and resting her head on his shoulder. "I told you I'm no good at that."

"I'm not exactly an expert at relationships, either." Nathan said. "But, there's no one else I'd rather try with. And, you do look very sexy wearing that flannel shirt."

"Go to sleep Tough Guy." Audrey said laughing, her eyes closed. There room was silent again, as sleep overtook them.

*Two Months Later*

"You have strange ideas for a first date." Nathan said, as they stood in the middle of the Keegan's barn. "Well, official first dates at least."

"Hey you promised in my dream, that we would do this." Audrey said, turning to face him. "Do you want to know, why I chose Chris over you that day?" She had caught him a little off guard, with her question. Sometimes, he did wonder about it. But, Nathan never was one to dwell in the past.

"No," He replied honestly, wrapping his arms around her waist. Pulling her closer, and staring into her eyes. "It's in the past." And, Audrey could tell he really meant what he was saying. Not just saying what he thought, she wanted to hear.

"You're right." She agreed, running her hands slowly up his arms. Even though, Nathan couldn't feel her skin. He could feel the pressure of her hands, through his dress shirt.

"All that really matters," She finished, wrapping her arms around his neck. "Is that we're finally where we are supposes to be." Nathan met her halfway for a kiss. That was too short but sweet for him. But, he knew Audrey was intentionally leaving him longing for more.

Without a word, Audrey held out her right hand towards him. Nathan accepted it, and they finally walked out of the barn together. Nathan didn't let go of her hand, until they reached his truck. Audrey smiled as He opened the Truck's passenger side door for her. It was an old fashioned gesture, and one of the main qualities that she loved about him.

"So, where are we going next?" Nathan asked, as he got in the truck and put his seatbelt on.

"If you take me back to my apartment right now, and make me pancakes." She replied, with a devilish smile. "I will not only wear that red flannel shirt for you. I'll let you help me take it off."

"Are we talking before, or after I make the pancakes?" He asked, smiling back at her.

"You'll just have to wait and see." She replied, as Nathan started the truck and they drove down the long driveway.

It had been a long road, and even a harder lesson for them to learn. But, they had finally found each. Both of them feeling complete, no longer broken.

**AUTHOR'S NOTE #2: It's finally finished! I want to thank everyone who stuck with this story, regardless how long it took me to update. The idea for the story was inspired, by a video I made months ago and posted on Youtube (Audrey & Nathan – Broken) No, the video didn't take me months to make, in case you were wondering. **


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